Flashback

Flashback..Flashback..and Flashback..

I wish it's only me..I wish that you won't appear in my memories..everytime our memories appear..I don't know should I smile or cry..laying on my bed alone..hugging my booster tightly thinking the way you hug me..yes..I do miss your hugs..you hugged me tightly through the night eventhough I had fever..maybe you don't even know that everytime you hold my hand or hugged me..it's like my heart skipped a beat..I miss that feeling..I miss the expression you made when you 'manja' with me..now..everything I do, there will be a shadow of you around me..when I clean my ears,when I laying on the bed you bought,when I hiding myself in the blanket,when I cook in the kitchen and etc..why is it you're the one who appear in my life? Why you made me love you? I really wish all of these never happen in my life before..because I still miss you eventhough I don't want to..

I hate it..I hate myself!